Weeds Star Mary Louise Parker Signing Autographs For fans! And her Biggest fan… ME!

This promises to be a unique night to say the least. The lovely Erica is joining me tonight for… Wait for it… Wait for it… The Best in Drag Show Benefiting the Aid for Aids Foundation. Now normally, this wouldn’t be my first choice for an event, but I have to say, it will be interesting to say the least. I mean really who doesn’t love a good drag show right? It takes patience, dedication, and flair to do what these guys do, and even though I don’t think I would look good in heels, if you can pull it off, I say go for it. Well, one of the guest judges is one of the people I have wanted to meet for a long long time. I am talking about Ms. Nancy Botwin, Mary Louise Parker. I have been a fan since she was making those wonderful Fried Green Tomatoes, and now Weeds is one of my favorite shows ever. So, god willing, I will be able to at least get an autograph, a picture a makeover or something. Wish me luck… Deep breath…

4:01 p.m. – Erica and I just got down to downtown LA. I really don’t love downtown; I’m more of a suburban kinda guy, so I really feel out of my element. Tonight is a benefit for an organization called Aid for Aids, and what they do is help improve the quality of life for those individuals suffering from HIV/AIDS. Take a look at their website http://www.aidforaids.org for more information.

4:12 p.m. – So, after scoping out the scene Erica and I are parking around the back. There really doesn’t seem to be a good place to wait, the back is gated off, the front is still locked up tight, so if they drop it will be kind of a mess with everyone arriving… sigh…

4:34 p.m. – Apparently Ms. Parker is going to be a celebrity judge on the panel along with Ms. Anna Farris, Chris Pratt, Jennifer Coolidge, Jo Anne Worley, Jayma Mays, and Camryn Manheim.

4:56 p.m. – Erica has a really cool thing for Ms. Parker an original program from her Tony winning performance in Proof, I have my cast signed Weeds insert and a magazine as well. I have about 40 other things at home but I didn’t want to be greedy! LOL…

5:12 p.m. – We heard call time was at 5:00 p.m. but so far no one has shown up. Well, there was a guy dressed up like the Statue of Liberty, but I don’t think that counts. He was fierce though! Wow… I just quoted Tyra Banks…

5:33 p.m. – One other collector just showed up. So, we are now three. I’m not expecting a lot of other people here, I mean besides the aforementioned State of Liberty. I just don’t know if we can even get any access. Erica just went off to make friends with the security guard. Having cute women around to get info from men is a definite plus! See Erica I called you cute… 

5:46 p.m. – It’s still pretty quiet… I did see a 6’3 man covered in glitter, this really is like a gay comic con. One guys Luke Skywalker is another guys Dolly Parton and I totally get that!

6:01 p.m. – Well, since the back is dead, we’re heading to the front of the venue now. The press line is supposed to start at 6:00 p.m. but no one seemingly has arrived yet. I say seemingly because we really don’t know for sure.

6:09 p.m. – I really feel like I am in a scene from Too Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything Julie Newmar. I kid you not! It’s so great!

6:12 p.m. – There are five other collectors here now. Apparently, they came in from France and are doing everything they can this weekend to make money. Great. (Insert sarcasm here)

6:22 p.m. – Camryn Manheim just showed up. She is signing and taking pics. She seems so nice. There are a row of guys in the restaurant next door rating men as they walk by. As Camryn walks by she yelled “I love my gays!” and they cheered.

6:24 p.m. – I got an 8.5 from the guys. I think that’s pretty good, I accept an 8.5 especially because I’m about 10 pounds above my normal weight right now. It’s water weight… just water weight…

6:25 p.m. – Okay, Burger King weight but still weight nonetheless… lol…

6:33 p.m. – Anna Farris and her husband/fiancé Chris Pratt just arrived. I have my Lost in Translation picture disc for her. But Chris is not letting Anna sign. He said, “She’ll do it after guys.” I’m not really here for her, and have met her twice before. She was so sweet both times, so I’m not holding it against her.

6:35 p.m. – With Anna walking in no one saw Jayma Mays except of course Erica! Her and her eagle eye! Harrumph. She got Jayma on her Glee poster but Jayma wouldn’t sign anything else so I was shut out…

6:41 p.m. – Jo Anne Worley just arrived, and she is really nice, and taking the time to sign for everyone.

6:45 p.m. – As it gets later and later my hopes are getting smaller and smaller. Cause the show starts at 7:00 p.m. and whoever arrives now still has to do the press line, and get inside… ugh…

6:47 p.m. – Holland Taylor just arrived. The guys are going crazy! She is so nice, taking pics and signing as well. There is one guy, who looks stunning. He has a huge afro, and has to be at least 6’7. Damn!

6:52 p.m. – Oh God, there she is! Ms. Mary Louise Parker. She is walking around the corner and looks so adorable. I have my Weeds promo insert at the ready. Everyone walks up to her, and she is so sweet. She stops and starts signing. She gets my insert second, and I think I was babbling… Okay, Erica confirmed I was babbling, but I started telling her how much I loved Bullets over Broadway, and Weeds, and Fried Green Tomatoes, etc… She was like, “Oh My God, thank you so much.” Erica got her Proof program out and Ms. Parker looked at it, and was like stunned. She signed it, and Erica said, “You were so great in this. You should have done the movie.” To which Ms. Parker replied, “Yeah, Fuck her.” So Nancy Botwin! I love it. I got my magazine out, and as she was about to sign it, I asked Ms. Parker to personalize it, and she stopped and did so. I then asked her if I could get a pic. Erica had to chime in and said, “He’s such a huge fan and has been waiting to meet you for like 6 years!” So, now I feel like an uberdork… but… I got my picture! Whoo hoo! I am so stoked! That was just incredible. She was so nice. I love meeting people you really are a fan of, and having them not only live up to your expectations, but exceed them!

7:05 p.m. – Jennifer Coolidge just arrived late, and is being rushed inside. She does try and stop to sign a couple but Erica and I don’t bother her because she is in a hurry. She looks great though.

Such a great night! Whoo hoo! I just wanted to give Erica a shout out, for coming with me, and helping me not go into my “Leonard Nimoy I can’t move” mode. Such a great day.

Originally published by Mike Sametz as Mike Gets Around on www.mishmashmagazine.com