I’m recovering… I’m not an addict but I’m recovering from the insanity, the drama and the craziness of the Independent Spirit Awards 2013. Let me tell you, this was the most insane day I have had in a long long time. I mean, it was like comedy, drama and excitement all rolled into one.
Now, the thing is, this year I didn’t think that the list for the Independent Spirit Awards was all that exciting. I mean, sure you have a lot of people but if you look at it like math… Okay, you have the people that you know will come over, divide that by the hours you’ve waited and times it by the randoms and surprise signers…and there you go.
Today we have The Lovely Erica, The Other Mike, Billy Beer, Scotty, Karalee and myself along with a couple other people in our group. Oh DVD Dave is here too.
So, some people got there early, some people came later etc… Let’s just say, in the beginning there was a lot of drama. We had a nice section and then one of the dealers gave us some problems and we had to deal with that.
Now, I could say a lot. I’m just not going to waste my energy and bandwidth on certain people. What I’m going to say is this. For all the people that have emailed me about where to go for legit autographs and people who do sell, I know I’ve said I would not offer recommendations because I didn’t really agree with it. Times have changed. I’m going to make a list of where to go. Give me a few days and I will now offer my recommendations.
With that out of the way, and god help me behind me, I’m going to focus on the day at hand. The Spirit Awards are a long grueling day and this is going to be a long long post.
6:55 a.m. – So, we’re pretty situated in our spots right now. So, hopefully, the only other drama will be my hatred of sand and having to be in such close proximity to it. Along with Jonah Hill, sand is my other nemesis. It gets in every orifice you have, cracks, everything… It’s torture. I hate it. HATE IT! I’m not even fond of Santa Monica, which is ironic since I come here five days a week.
7:23 a.m. – There are a bunch of people here, but not as many as you would think. I’m thinking it’s because of the list, but you never know. There are still good people coming.
8:01 a.m. – The tent for the Spirit Awards looks sort of majestic in the morning light. LOL… Thankfully, it’s not as windy as past years. Last year, it was horrible.
8:43 a.m. – Erica and Karalee are measuring which one is taller. They look like Asian bookends. They are so cute!
I look like death after dealing with getting up early. I am not an early morning person. I hate mornings almost as much as sand. Sand is the enemy and mornings are my battlefield.
9:23 p.m. – Karalee is really hoping to see Channing Tatum and who can blame her. I’ve been a Channing Tatum fan long before everyone jumped on the bandwagon. Good for him though!
9:34 a.m. – I’m not sure who I care about the most to be honest. I like the random names but I do like the big people. I would love to get John Waters who is an epic director, and did one of my favorite movies of all time Serial Mom. Love it!
9:46 a.m. – Karalee and I are doing a bathroom run… I mean not that you can run to get the bathroom but you get the idea. Did I mention I’m exhausted and hate mornings… Especially mornings that put me next to sand.
10:01 a.m. – OMG. Now there’s another drama with a photographer pushing one of the collector’s around to get his spot. What the fuck is up with people man. I mean I get the frustration but getting somewhere at 10:00 and then thinking you’re going to get right on the barricade is a tad dickish…
10:15 a.m. – Erica and Karalee are posing for a cute photo! I love it.
10:18 a.m. – Billy is chilling in his chair. Scotty has a shit ton of stuff for Dave Grohl so I’m helping him with Dave and he’s helping me with Zoe Saldana.
10:35 a.m. – It’s getting crowded at the barricade a second and third row now.
10:41 a.m. – The valet are in place. Honestly, they look like a cadet review but what can you do?
10:48 a.m. – One of the valet dudes, has bright green sunglasses on. That’s what I call class.
10:53 a.m. – hopefully, things will start heating up here soon. We’re eating candy thanks to Karalee which is not on my diet but since all I had from McDonald’s this morning was oatmeal I deserve it. I’ve been good dammit!
11:02 a.m. – First arrival! It’s Beasts of the Southern Wild star Quvenzhané Wallis! It’s a little discombobulated there for a second. honestly, I don’t have anything for her, but I told my friend I would help him.
11:09 a.m. – After getting in and out of the car three times… Quvenzhané Wallis looks like she’s coming over. She goes to the far end though.
We yell and yell, even though we only have a couple photos for a friend.
Sadly, she doesn’t make it down this far. Sigh…
11:12 a.m. – There’s SNL star Fred Arminsen. Billy has a photo and he’s pretty frantically calling out to him, but… Fred goes to the far end as well. Dammit!
11:14 a.m. – This isn’t boding well for the future. Billy just got all grumpy because he’s worried.
11:15 a.m. – I have a plan and I’m huddling with Erica about it. We’re going to get pumped!
11:19 a.m. – Oh, it’s Jason Schwartzman from Rushmore!
He’s one of the nicest guys ever. And since we’re getting shafted we have to be quick on the poster draw! Jason Schwartzman see’s my Rushmore mini poster and comes right to Billy Beer and I. Perhaps you saw Billy Beer’s photo flop earlier. LOL…
Jason Schwartzman is one of the nicest guys out there and pretty much covers the line.
11:22 a.m. – There’s Andy Samberg. He’s just… Blech.
Honestly, he doesn’t even look over. Finally he gave a half wave at the crowd. He’s not a nice guy and get it if he doesn’t have time to sign autographs but yesh.
11:23 a.m. – BTW… Nice green sport coat
11:25 a.m. – Tyler Hoechlin and Brittany Snow have just pulled up. Tyler is a nice guy and comes right on over.
Brittany doesn’t come over right away but eventually does.
She pretty much makes it down from the end of the line to past us. Both are really cool. Brittany signs my Pitch Perfect mini poster and Billy is on Photo Flop #2. LOL…
11:28 a.m. – It’s Harry Potter star Jason Isaacs! He is again such a nice guy.
He signed an index card for a friend of a friend for me. Once he’s done signing a car almost hit him! Dude, Lucius Malfoy almost got ran over! DOH!
11:31 a.m. – Oh hell it’s Sam Rockwell and Leslie Bibb! Now, both of them are not friendly. If you remember Leslie Bibb called Pinky a douche on Twitter. Sam is nominated today and I have my Galaxy Quest mini poster that I fear will never get finished. Wait.. holy hell Sam Rockwell is coming over!
They asked him if he wanted to and Sam literally came right to Billy and I! His autograph is complete crap, like a line, lol… But at this point, I’m fine. It’s done. LOL…
11:36 a.m. – And there’s Bradley Cooper! He’s coming over and then security grabs him and leads him to the other side to avoid the dealer who was causing us problems earlier in the day. Now, to be honest, I would trade four of Bradley Cooper’s “BC” autographs for one of Sam Rockwell’s “S” autographs so even though we don’t get him, I’m okay.
11:37 a.m. – As Bradley is signing away from us Chris Tucker arrives and walks straight over.
he doesn’t even get near us. I don’t have anything for Chris since I met him earlier this year, so if we’re going to miss people I’m okay so far. LOL…
11:40 a.m. – Another drop… It’s Django Unchained star Kerry Washington! Erica and I are really working on pulling stuff out fast and sure enough we whip our Django mini posters out faster than Phoebe Price RSVPing for a red carpet. Kerry looks right at us and comes right on over and signs both of our posters!
She is super nice and makes sure to get to a decent amount of people.
11:42 a.m. – It’s Rosemarie DeWitt and Ron Livingston! Billy is going a tad crazy for Rosemarie even though I question the fact that he actually knows Rosemarie since he is screaming Rosemary. I digress. It doesn’t look like she’s coming and then does but security takes them away from us even though they were headed right for us.
I don’t have anything for either one but Billy is upset because he loves Rosemary… I mean Rosemarie.
11:44 a.m. – Amour director Michael Haneke is arriving. There is one very passionate fan of his here and Michael Haneke is nice enough to come on over for him. That was very nice of Michael Haneke to do.
11:49 a.m. – It’s The Family Stone star Dermot Mulroney! He’s really cool and comes right on over to us.
I have my The Family Stone mini poster for him and he was like, “Who else signing this!” I was like, “Oh, it Rachel McAdams!”
Then we talked for a half second about the movie. He made it down to Scotty and signed a lot for people!
12:03 p.m. – A bit of a lull… Oh, it’s Jeremy Renner! He hasn’t been that nice lately and it looks like he’s going to go right inside. I have my Hansel and Gretel: Which Hunters mini poster for him. Oh shit… He’s coming over. He comes right to Billy Beer and then signs my mini poster and about 10 -15 things before heading back.
12:05 p.m. – That was a nice surprise! Erica didn’t get to him though. Sorry!
12:10 p.m. – Oh shizz! It’s about to get crazy up here in this bizz! Look at me being all gangster! I love it. Salma Hayek is here! I have a Frida mini poster as well as a Los Angeles magazine from 1996 for her. Erica doesn’t have anything so she takes my magazine. I wave the Frida poster like a whore trying to get a piece of crack rock and security tries to take Salma Hayek farther down but she points to us and I hear her say, “I wanna start here.”
She signs one for Billy Beer, then my poster, a couple more then sees Erica’s magazine. She takes it, shows her husband/manager and they have a moment looking at it. She points to Erica and I’m telling you it was a whole moment. I loved it!
Salma Hayek gives it back to Erica and then signs it. She then makes it down pretty far, but Scotty is farther and is waving a giant sign he made for Salma Hayek.
LOL… We start yelling at Salma Hayek, and telling her about Scotty,
she looks over and says something we can’t hear and then heads over to Scotty, and we all start to clap for her because she took such extra time to make sure and sign for Scotty. Hall of fame! So nice! Kind! And to quote Suddenly Susan… “lovely”
12:13 p.m. – I’m so impressed with Salma Hayek. I’ll tell you. Adorable!
12:15 p.m. – It’s Common. He runs on over but misses our section. Billy keeps waving his photo and Common’s girlfriend comes back, takes Billy’s photo, gets Common to sign it, and then brings it back. LOL… That was so nice!
12:26 p.m. – Oh damn it’s Matthew McConaughey. He’s put back on some of the weight he lost for his last movie. He takes a couple photos and then comes right on over.
I have my Dazed and Confused mini poster out and Matthew McCona-hottie is happy to sign it. I’m so stoked! He signs about 20 things… Not too shabby.
12:34 p.m. – It’s Ellen Page! She dropped like right next to us. I whipped out my Hard Candy mini poster super fast and she came right over and signed it and went down the line.
She signed quite a bit actually. She one per person, which is fine, I totally get that.
12:39 p.m. – It’s on like Donkey Kong! Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe just arrived and he’s coming right on over. He’s signing down the line and really taking his time… Very impressive.
12:42 p.m. – Shit, Jennifer Lawrence is dropping at the same time. She heads down to the other side of us. Sigh… Jennifer seems to be moving faster than Daniel but lord… Daniel is getting closer but it doesn’t look like Jennifer is going to get down this far. LOL… I’m shocked she signed to be honest.
12:43 p.m. – Jennifer is right next to us now but she’s not even looking at what she’s signing and just making a “O” on people’s stuff. It’s like really callus. Ugh… I used to love her so. She signs a picture for Karalee, Erica’s Silver Linings mini poster and then, and I’ve never done this before EVER. I took my poster away. I didn’t want her to sign that garbage on a poster that has the full cast including Robert DeNiro. I can’t. I just can’t.
12:44 p.m. – Daniel Radcliffe is next to us now and signs Billy’s photo and then he stops.
Grumble… Literally Daniel stopped at Billy right before me! And I’ll tell you I think he stopped because people were getting way way too pushy. I had a guy slam into me so hard one of my boards bent. I mean get a fucking grip people.
12:46 p.m. – That was a little disappointing.
12:50 p.m. – I’m looking at Billy’s Jennifer Lawrence photo and I think I made the right decision. I wouldn’t want that crap on such a nice poster.
12:59 p.m. – There’s Zoe Saldana! Now here’s something I forgot to mention, apparently, I’ve been obsessed with Zoe Saldana today. LOL… I keep missing her! So Scotty and Erica are helping me with her today. I have two magazines from 2009 and two Star Trek posters to get done!
1:03 p.m. – Zoe drops and comes right over.
She does a nice section of the line and I see Scotty get her to sign my magazine I gave him. Then as she gets down farther her publicist is telling her what to sign to make sure it’s one each.
She signed my Star Trek mini poster and Erica had her sign my Star Trek Into Darkness mini poster as well.
I’m so stoked! I have one magazine left, but I’m really happy. lol…
1:07 p.m. – Bruce Willis just dropped. We all yell for him and he walks over so we can star at him. So, we can gaze at his bald head. LOL… Karalee said it best when she renamed him Douche Willis. LOL…
1:18 p.m. – Dave Grohl just arrived and headed right on in.
1:23 p.m. – Jason Bateman is here.
It doesn’t look like he’s going to come over but he runs over and signs like 10-15 things.
1:26 p.m. – It’s Paul Rudd! Paul comes over and signs a few things.
He’s honestly not super friendly but he does it for a bit. I get him on This is 40 and Erica helps me with a Vanity Fair magazine.
1:42 p.m. – Dennis Quaid is parking. We all yell for him and he signs for a second but then heads in. Ah well…
2:12 p.m. – We have a bit of a breather. It’s kind of nice actually. We are able to get our bearings for a bit.
2:29 p.m. – Oh wait… There’s Daniel Radcliffe leaving! He comes BACK over and signs.
He goes farther down. Erica takes off to get her photo with him and Billy watches my stuff so I can run down. Daniel signs for the full line and I got him on my Harry Potter mini poster as well.
Dude, that’s rock star status. #awesome!
2:41 p.m. – Zoe Saldana is leaving. Generally Zoe only signs going in or going out, but holy hell she’s coming BACK over and signs some more.
She does one each down the line and is super cute! While she runs over she takes off her shoes so she can move faster. I mean, damn that was pretty nice!
3:02 p.m. – Dave Grohl is leaving and comes on over. He says, “Now, I’m not going to be able to sign everything guys…” he makes his way down the line, gets to Scotty and then I have him sign Scotty’s CD cover. He gets down really far though. Pretty fucking cool!
3:43 p.m. – People are leaving. Nina Dobrev is heading out and gets in her car, but gets back out to sign autographs for people. Nice!
3:44 p.m. – John Waters is leaving. He looks at me waving my Serial Mom mini poster but only waves.
3:49 p.m. – There’s Breaking Bad star Bryan Cranston! Such a nice man. He comes on over and signs down the line.
I admire the really nice celebrities. I mean, super cool!
3:51 p.m. – I yell and yell for John Waters… He says, “I can’t!”
3:52 p.m. – Enlightened star Laura Dern is heading on over after some prodding. I don’t have anything for her but she signs a bunch down the line. Pretty cool!
3:57 p.m. – John Waters is still waiting for his car. Still won’t come over.
4:03 p.m. – Mary Elizabeth Winstead is leaving and comes on over. She starts on the far end. I have my Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter mini poster and lenticular poster with me for her. She signs and signs and signs down the line.
Her publicist is about to pull her but sees my Abraham Lincoln mini poster and says, Oh you have to sign that! Mary Elizabeth Winstead switches to silver signs mine and then signs the lenticular poster as well. NICE!
4:09 p.m. – John Waters is still standing there.
4:11 p.m. – Bruce Willis is leaving and again lets us gaze at him to take a photo of him. Kill me now, I want to throw up.
4:15 p.m. – John Waters is just now walking to his car. He did not have time to sign two autographs. ;/
4:25 p.m. – Finally New Girl star Hannah Simone is leaving. She says, One second, goes back inside, comes back out and signs even though you can tell she didn’t want to.
In fact she really didn’t want to do it. Ah well. She signed my New Girl mini poster.
I’m bushed and it’s over. I didn’t see everyone I wanted but Damn.. It was a long fun night and I have no complaints! I feel like I just went to war, lol… Still, I’m pretty happy with the way everything turned out. Even with the earlier drama.
Now for a nice shower, massage and rest.
As an added bonus the sand didn’t torment me which is the biggest miracle of the day. YAY!
Until next time kids…
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